I was sitting with Cindi last month waiting for the men’s group to begin. We were talking about the different events in our lives that have paved the way to become “colleagues” in this crazy world of cancer. During the past seventeen months she’s had the opportunity to observe what love and support are all about between Bonnie and me. I tried to explain to Cindi that I do not know what the special ingredients are to keep a couple together over the years, and then the pursuit of breast cancer recovery. I suppose witnessing broken hearts over the years have helped each of us galvanize what we have together. Our honesty with each other is at the forefront of everything we do as a couple, as parents, as lovers, as friends. I suppose the way we’ve prioritized things in our lives has certainly helped … there was a time in our lives, not that long ago, when yours truly would get in the car as the 5:PM whistle blew, head to the corner gas station, purchase two 22 ounce beers for the ride home and have one of them consumed in the first three hundred yards only to arrive home and sit on the back porch with a fridge full of beers and wait for the phone to ring to handle a problem at work that just could not be handled by the guy I worked for. The money was phenomenal, the house was huge, the bank accounts were solid and the breeze coming off the Atlantic was so close you could smell the brine. The past couple of years there I slept an average two hours a night while managing my blood pressure with numbers that would stagger you. One afternoon, that cell phone of mine rang and I took the call out in the driveway to get out of earshot of the girls. I slept like a baby when that phone call came to its’ end. It was one of those discussions with your boss that just had to be made. Of course, as suspected, the handwriting was on the wall when I arrived to work the next day. He heard what I had to say and was then handed my resignation letter. This was three years ago, nearly to the day and something remarkable came out of that resignation. Our family moved to the west coast, Bonnie’s first mammogram identified an anomaly and, as they say … the rest is history. I can’t say for sure if the medical group she visited annually for her mammograms would have discovered the breast cancer tumors or not … what I can say is that the tumors have been discovered, removed, and here we are writing and reading about it. It’s the decisions we make each and every day that help shape the world we live in and living together in harmony is one way of going about our lives. I know for certain there are far too many of us out there without the relationship status Bonnie and I happen to share. I don’t know the reasons you read this blog and as the subtitle states: “WORDS CAN HELP. HERE ARE MINE. WHAT ARE YOURS?”
Is it really that easy?
Thanks for listening.